No Pants, No Problem

OUR ADDICTION TO BALANCE

Most of my residency training, like the rest of the world, was deeply affected by the COVID pandemic. Telehealth was only in its infancy at the onset of the pandemic. Psychiatry, arguably more easily than any other medical specialty, was converted to a wholly virtual practice overnight. In 2023, I entered fellowship, at which time the pandemic was mostly resolved. Much of my training then was in-person, but a large proportion was still done virtually.

August 2024 marked the beginning of my first attending position. My position offered flexibility of having up to half my workweek as virtual. That is, I only needed to come into office 2 or 3 days of the week depending on how I structured my schedule. This allowed me to more freely decide on where to live as a long commute would be more tolerable. It also saved me so much time for personal endeavors.

Despite the luxury and convenience of working from home, I’ve always held onto the value of face to face interactions. Many of my colleagues in residency found in-person training, whether didactic lectures or seeing patients, to hold limited value. From the susurration amongst colleagues to the most liminal shifts in patient affect, there was so much to be gleaned from live interface. Of course, there are also the practical components of psychiatric diagnosis and treatment (cognitive and physical examinations are particularly important for geriatric work)!

After a year in my current position, the things I enjoy most about working from home are lunches with Peter, increased physical activity, and ability to get small tasks done in between patients or during no-shows. Driving 30-40 minutes one-way also gets mentally and physically exhaustive, though that’s arguably self-imposed suffering owing much to my home base. This pain is assuaged by the long list of audiobooks I now have access to, much thanks to Peter’s expansive Libby collection!

However, the days of in-person work also came with it several perks. As much as I love spending time with Peter, this allowed for much needed physical space. It’s important that we are a part of each other’s lives, but at the same time can tolerate being apart from each other. Boundaries aside, I’ve found great joy in developing friendships with my colleagues at work. It seems increasingly rare that opportunities in adulthood to make friends present themselves.

Though I was a champion of preserving some in-person work, Peter was thoroughly proselytized into complete remote work. For him, the benefits vastly outweighed any negatives. As someone who is now working on the IT side of healthcare, his work is almost entirely computer-based. He has little need to interface with teammates in-person. In fact, he much prefers it this way. Peter also gets to harness the full power of 4 monitors and a desk treadmill at his home set up.

A set up designed for maximum productivity, Peter is able to complete his W2 job, side projects, housekeeping, and fitness all in an 8 hour workday. He also gets to preserve his limited social energy. And as a self-acclaimed passenger princess, Peter avoids driving at all costs. There’s virtually no drawback for him when it comes to working from home.

With Peter working completely remotely save for an in-person gathering once every few months, our arrangement has actually worked out well. We get breathing room from each other, and Peter’s job flexibility allows for even greater management of household tasks. We’ve been able to coordinate in such a fashion that all household, personal, and professional tasks are met.

XOXO,

Howard and Peter